


Can't Bear to Watch

by dinoburger



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Accidental Voyeurism, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Bad Puns, Destroying Childhood Memories, F/M, Family Issues, Gen, Identity Issues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-25
Updated: 2015-10-25
Packaged: 2018-04-27 21:20:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,098
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5064586
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dinoburger/pseuds/dinoburger
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Flowey is no longer what they used to be. Why should anything or anyone from back then matter?</p><p>They watch as a present concern of theirs comes together with a past memory.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Can't Bear to Watch

**Author's Note:**

> My first time publicly posting my own smutty fanfic (I think...?)! Yay!
> 
> I'd like you to take what you will from this first, I'll talk about it a little bit more at the end.
> 
> There is also one hell of a bad pun in there and it caused me great pain to write it in I hope sans is happy.

This meadow is no memory of mine.

Scarcely is it more than a dream from someone else’s life.

A mother, a father, two children. The figment of a happy family.

It doesn’t feel real, not to me. Did I imagine it? Too good, too good to be true. It can’t be, it can’t be true. That's all I can think.

The past is replaced by the present, and the present replaced in turn. Time overlaps itself, time goes on.

Can you believe there are times I must still exercise caution? It’s laughable to consider, laughable. When it all comes to an end, it only goes back again, regardless, regardless… Never back to the very beginning, of course.

Even so, I can’t shake it, there’s a feeling I get. What’s missing here? What don’t I know?

When I see him, I’m unsure.

At the edge of the ruins, scattered crumbled brick, I sit amongst the buttercups. In the rolling expanse of grass, he stood there. A figure that could only loom over a flower, set at a wandering pace. Effortless, stained clothes, slippered feet. His gaze is heavy, lethargic. But to feel the weight of those eyes is something I would rather not bear.

So as he passes, I hide my face. My roots prickle. Plants can’t know what it means to fear, but we have good intuition.

Everything, near everything stays consistent to time. Except for him, one of few things that shift between the folds, the overlaps and restarts. The only thing I’ve seen that jumps and skips like a record’s needle, but more deliberately.

I glimpsed a flicker in those empty sockets, once. Once was enough.

It’s laughable, but there are still times I must exercise caution.

There are things even I couldn’t have known. What was said, in all instances, what was started. What happened in the in-betweens. Voices I couldn’t have heard.

She approached from the cavern’s shadows. His face lit up to match that ever-present grin. Warm milk and honey in living form, perhaps she was. Her sweetness makes me sick, her warmth is unreachable. Unbearable, her figure was large but never looming, welcoming all she came across. Safe to say that we have only mutual disgust for one another.

The two talk, nothing is significant to me. I’m not here to listen, just biding my time. I pick up the tones of their voices. Fondness, joking, laughing.

There’s familiarity there, from a dream.

She took his hand, muttered softer, lower. Purring. Broad nose nuzzled velvet on the ridges of his bones. He hummed adoration. I’ll wait out these loathsome endearments. Lingering long against each other, I’m tired of it already. In the repetitive nature of how things are, I can’t bear to let such nothings go on.

My stem crawls as he let out a sigh. She kneeled to his level, embracing, pressing wet kisses to his jaw and down to his collar while skeletal fingers sank into her fur. Hollow nostrils breathed her in deep, hands moving to push up his shirt and lean in, steadying herself on his hip. The skeleton gasped, blunt teeth on his rib-bone. She chuckled into him, rattling at the sensation.

(how much longer… how much longer…)

He let her undress him, let her study his exposed frame. Let her run that silky tongue across his ribs and nibble him, bone on bone. He let her push him back into the grass and flowers to pin him beneath. Her dominance was a tender, generous one. He pulled her in to smother him, buried under her thick, white form.

Nausea coiled through me. I peered out from trembling petals, helpless to even move.

Although it didn’t matter. It didn’t, neither of them. The sap in my frail body was as thick and sickly as molasses. It was beyond me. I couldn’t. I couldn’t bear to watch. My insides shuddered and scraped as she ground against him.

That foreign sound, that laughter, how faintly, recalling… How can I comprehend…

The loving relationship that started it all, started it all was gone. Gone with the past. The exchanges that ended it, the prince never heard. The exchanges with Toriel’s new partner, he’d never known. It was easy to say it didn’t matter.

But, to watch, to watch, to wait, to wait…

And all this because

And all this because

Their laughter was an echo, but the way they twined together

Make it stop.

His spine arched up, such breathless sounds, deep and wavering. Her fingers delved into the crevices of his hip bone, sticky blue energy dancing.

Between petal and pollen, one dark eye watched.

Pushing up into her touch, rasping her name, losing control.

She grinned. “Ah, I’m so happy that we’ve gotten this matter down to its… bare bones.”

Sans broke out in a fit of giggles, unable to stop himself. Their pace was picking up, faster. He writhed and giggled, overwhelmed. There was a slick, wet sound. A shimmering blue thickness forming, dripping. Toriel admired the sight of it, before Sans clutched her fur and pulled her in even closer.

“I-I…” the smaller swallowed. “I th-th-think I’m…. nnhhh… ahh…” Sans could hardly compose himself enough to say it, his thoughts kept scattering under each firm thrust of her fingers. “C-coming close t-t-to the e-dge…” he wasn’t going to last much longer, hard panting breaking the sentence apart.

“Of, h-hah… glory-el.”

With this, Toriel burst out in fresh laughter. Cries of pleasure intermingled with careless giggles, panting and moaning. The cavern echoed with it, blue light spilling out from between them, growing brighter and brighter.

The outcome was inevitable, by this point. There was a blinding flash. As the light subsided once more, the two lay in each other’s embrace. No-one would notice, the clearing was one flower short now.

I could reset this place. I could reset it all. But nothing could undo what I’d seen.

Agonizing, unreachable, unbearable. Memories, people, laughter.

I never asked for this, for this miserable existence.

Why? Why? Why? I shouldn’t care about their useless lives at all. What of it? Why?

Disappearing into the earth isn’t enough. I want to be crushed and torn apart. It doesn’t matter, it all resets, resets, resets anyway… It’s too late, I already saw everything.

I could have done something… why would I want to? It doesn’t matter. It’s nothing of mine, not who I am. I can’t, I can’t go back, never back to anything before, before then. I can’t think.

I have to beat it out of myself somehow. I can’t… think…

**Author's Note:**

> I actually think I might do a few little fic-type things revolving around Flowey. It started with some thoughts about how they would feel towards sans, and well... now I have some other ideas I'd like to put in motion too.
> 
> Uhm. There was one possible problem I found after thinking it through that might set this in an AU rather than in the canonical timelines. If it bothers you especially we can talk further in the comments.
> 
> Anyhow, let's wrap this up with a touch of art, shall we?
> 
> http://dinoburger.tumblr.com/post/131547222367/so-my-first-undetale-fic-ended-up-being-soriel


End file.
